After work yesterday I was so bloody tired that all I managed to do was eat some dinner, take a bath and drift off to sleep. And I am truly grateful that I am able to do so.
Gratitude decided to club me on the head yesterday afternoon. It went something like this:
Walking back to my car, I saw him. He was crouched over a bag next to a public trash can, right in front of where I was parked. He appeared to try and make himself as small as possible, to be as unobtrusive as he could to passerby. I watched him pause as I got into my car and then he poked through the bag at his feet, looking to see what else was still edible. With a sick twist of my stomach, I realized he had just dug that bag out of the trash can and was eating the left overs from someone else's lunch. It's been a very long time since I witnessed something like this. And I debated what I would do, what I could do, to help his situation. As he got another bag out of the trash and started eating the ends of some sort of salad, I approached him. I asked him if he wanted a yogurt, and he brusquely said "Yes." I gave him the option of lemon or vanilla and he took the lemon, without thanks. This didn't bother me, because I could sense his discomfort with the situation. He didn't even meet my eyes. As I drove off, I gently reminded myself that sometimes you do what you can do, even if you feel you ought to be doing more. I hope that man finds what he needs in this life. And that occasionally people stop to see the suffering around them and maybe do something about it...
Then I went back to work and finished my day. I am so grateful I can have healthy food, that I have a home with loved ones, that my life DOES NOT SUCK. Even when it's difficult and troubling, it does not suck. And that is really the most important thing I can remember.
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